Oftentimes the authors are merely the theorist, not actually practitioners, they just speculate a subject from little or no evidence and formulate it in composition as an admonition for everyone.
The Subtle Art Of Not Giving A F*ck is a truly refreshing take on what it means to live a great life. Mark Manson’s writing is genuine and hits you right in the gut in the best possible way.
I have to say that it is the most rudest, funniest and most unapologetically honest self help book I’ve read. It truly resonated with my recent experiences in life and has been the medicine I needed.
I choose and pick 5 main points that I took away from this sagacious book to show you how you can implement into your life.
There is so much easy wisdom in this book. He effortlessly explained a lot of that. One of the most imperative points he unpacked in it is, its okay to feel bad.
1 – We all feel bad sometimes; no matter how successful you are, how amazing your life is, how great relationships you’ve. A huge component of living a healthy life is being good at accepting your negative or positive emotions because when you stop accepting that; when you try to deny your anger, you get mad at yourself because you are anxious or you feel bad — it creates that feedback loop, you start feeling guilty and start feeling angry at the fact that “You’re angry” which makes you even more angrier and you just start spiraling out of control.
The whole problem is this judgment that negative emotions are not acceptable.
Emotions are feedbacks; if you feel crappy your brain is telling you that there’s a problem that’s unaddressed or unresolved. This is part of life like its normal to be anxious, if you feel anxious you say it. If you’re angry; its okay, you might be angry for a good reason. These negative emotions aren’t necessarily negative. Alot of times they’re very helpful and learning to how to care about anything. Negative emotions are a necessary component of emotional health. To deny that negativity is to perpetuate problems rather than to solve them.
2 – The other thing which I loved the most in it is truth telling super hero The Disappointment Panda. Nobody wants him to be around but everyone really needs to hear him. Disappointment Panda is that super hero that walks around knocking on doors and telling people “Hey making more money is not gonna make your kids love you” and its like a stab in the chest and that person is like slams the door but its what they needs to hear.
3 – Pain is part of the process; you need to feel it in order to change. Fear, anxiety and sadness are often representatives of the necessary pain of psychological growth. To deny that pain is to deny our own potential. Just as one must suffer physical pain to build stronger bone and muscles, one must suffer emotional pain to develop greater emotional resilience, a stronger sense of self, increased compassion and generally a happier life.
4 – Hey-my-life-is-cooler-than-yours culture on social media has bred us that having anxiety, fear, failure and guilt is totally not okay. But the truth is tasting your imperfections and embracing them is the only way to love yourself. Don’t let every small thing that goes wrong leaves you uncomfortable. Prioritise who and what you give f*ck about.
5 – More isn’t always better. We’re actually often happier with less. When we’re overloaded with opportunities and options, we suffer from what psychologist refer to as the paradox of choice. Basically, the more option we are given, the less satisfied we become with whatever we choose. We have everything so cheap and easy now that its much harder to find meaning in our lives. If you look at rates of depression, anxiety disorders, eating disorders — stuff like that they are all because of a rise. There’s a crisis of meaning going on. First step is to conciously cut ourselves off to alot of various forms of materialism, distractions and validations. Shallow forms of pleasure that distract your mind from the great purpose of life.
Realize that you only have to care one or two things in life and not worry about whether your friends are having kids and you’re not whether you are getting older and losing your hairs and not achieving your desired objectives or goals. Start making decisions based on yourselves and not based on others. It sounds very simple but when you put in the practice alot of people try to teach you what is right and wrong for your life and try to be a hindrance to doing what we love for ourselves. Know that no one should or can tell you what you should do/not do and what you can achieve. Block out those voices and always do what feels right to you and what doesn’t feel right, don’t do.
Mark Manson stated in his book that his goal was to become a rock star. If Mark Manson didn’t love practicing and doing all that small stuff to get to his final goal – he didn’t actually want that goal its actually just a dream for him. And it is enlightening, it made me think about all the stuff in life we want to be but we’re not actively working towards. It’s a call to our own personal adventure. And how important it is now to ask ourselves that — In your business Do you like day to day?
What in your life you are caring about that you shouldn’t be?
Personally, I have read several books that revolves around self improvement and this book was definitely one of the very best books I have ever read on this subject. So if you unnecessarily think ALOT or feel a little lost, read this! ♡